That's a Wrap! And It's Only the Beginning...

Launching this ePortfolio has been a journey. In a short eight week class I have built a website from the ground up that I can be somewhat proud of. In the beginning, this course definitely gave me a strong dose of imposter syndrome. If this is you, I have great news! A recent study noted that people with moderate to frequent levels of the Imposter Phenomenon were the most productive scholars (Wester, et al., 2020). Coupled with the Innovation Project, I wasn't sure if I was I had chose then right program for my masters.

I started over on WordPress and quickly abandoned that venture to migrate over to Wix. It hasn't been all roses since landed here either, but I was too far in the journey to switch to something else. I struggled. Oh boy, did I struggle. I've always been a tech savvy person (hence, The Techy Texas Teacher branding), and I was embarrassed by the things I could not figure out. There were things I wanted to make happen, but I had to just walk away and leave it. This was very hard for me. I like things to be perfect (or at least appear that way). Let's call it a high level of excellence, yes, that sounds better. One thing that really bothered me was that the blog was my home page. But I just let it be because I could not figure it out. I had put a couple work arounds in place, I wasn't happy about it, but just let it be. While this may sound like giving up or not completing a project, this was growth for me. Fast forward to our peer review collaborative discussion and someone mentioned it. Maybe it was the time spent away from the blog, or viewing my peers amazing sites, but something clicked, and I was able to navigate and figure out Wix. I feel like my website represents something a bit more closely to what to the graphic design and technological caliber that I am used to producing.

I learned a lot about myself and how I could frame this experience within the Growth Mindset. I get on to my students all the time about how we don't say "can't" and we need to "reframe that with a yet." Check out the The Magical Yet as a great read aloud to introduce this to your classroom (DiTerlizzi, 2020)! I could have saved myself a lot of anxious moments of screaming at the computer screen had I just told myself, "Hey, I don't understand Wix, YET." It is a learning moment to look back at most of my educational career and see my successes and when they come. I have a familiar cycle of feeling unqualified, but knowing I need to push through and figure it out anyway and then somehow it all comes together. One of my teaching heroes, is Chris Biffle of Whole Brain Teaching (WBT). WBT has an awesome phrase, "We've got grit! We don't quit!" (Biffle, 2023). Grit is a powerful thing. It goes beyond motivation. It gives you the power to push through and persevere even when you do feel like you're unqualified or don't know what is going on.

I am so thankful for this experience. We participated in numerous group discussions that evolved from superficial comments to really digging into material and having academic discussions that flowed back and forth. I have found people in my program that I've never met in person, but I talk to nearly every day. I think the internet is so cool like that. To be able to have meaningful connections with people from all over is something I did not expect when starting this program. I am excited for the classes ahead and for the journey to continue. We may be wrapping up the first round of courses, but this is just the beginning of discovering who I am as an educator, academic, and colleague.

Biffle, C. (2023). Whole brain teaching for challenging kids (and the rest of your class, too!) (2nd edition).

DiTerlizzi, A. (2020). The magical yet. Disney-Hyperion.

Wester, K. L., Vaishnav, S., Morris, C. W., Austin, J. L., Haugen, J. S., Delgado, H., & Umstead, L. K. (2020). Interaction of imposter phenomenon and research self-efficacy on scholarly productivity. Counselor Education and Supervision, 59(4), 316–325.